Learning to Love Yourself: Cultivating Self-Compassion
By Lauren Godfrey
In a society that values productivity and achievement, it becomes difficult to prioritize oneself. Kindness within signals us to care for others in need, like family, friends, and coworkers. As life progresses, some people find that they have unmet needs that are becoming a barrier. When this happens, remember that it is never too late to practice self-compassion.
What is Self-Compassion?
Have you ever had a friend who was going through a challenging situation? What did you tell them? Perhaps you reminded them of their strengths. Maybe you encouraged them to keep trying. You probably instilled hope for the future! Do you do the same for yourself? Self-compassion happens when you identify a need and take action to get your need met healthily. Just like how you care for others, it can look like words of encouragement, distractions from stress, eating a healthy meal, and more.
How can I be more compassionate towards myself?
Once you realize that you need to have more compassion for yourself, you may wonder how. It became a habit to put others before yourself. You are used to making sacrifices for the greater good. Fortunately, there is information and skills you can master to better care for yourself.
An essential component of self-compassion is intentionality. It is necessary to reflect on your desires, actions, and boundaries. This way, you can conceptualize strengths that promote and barriers that prevent self-compassion. Reflection should be a curious, nonjudgmental examination. Consider setting a time and date to write or voice record your thoughts. Reflection leads to another essential to self-compassion: mindfulness.
Mindfulness is another skill that takes practice but will benefit you by allowing you to make the most of the present moment. It may feel uncomfortable, or even unnecessary, to intentionally tune in to your needs in the current moment when there are other priorities on your mind. Setting a timer every hour to scan your body for sensations that signal a need, such as thirst, hunger, or grounding, is a way to be mindful throughout the day. As you practice, you will see that being conscious of your needs feels more natural and soothing.
As you notice opportunities for self-compassion, you must add to and adjust your thoughts. As these thoughts arise, it is helpful to note that the thoughts are automatic but do not define you or the actions you take. While compassion for yourself grows, remember that progress will likely not look linear. There may be days when you are hard on yourself. Part of self-compassion is reminding yourself that you did your best and will try again the next day. Create a daily mantra that affirms kindness towards yourself, such as, “I embrace who I am today.” This positive self-talk will become more habitual the more it is practiced.
Finally, remember that you are not alone in your journey towards self-compassion. Many people experience shame, guilt, and distress over their imperfections or mistakes. We can find peace knowing that these internal struggles are very common for many people worldwide. Try confiding in loved ones about your goals to be more compassionate towards yourself. Your support system can reflect when they notice opportunities to be kinder to yourself. They can encourage you during the more challenging moments. You never need to do this alone.
When should I seek professional help to improve self-compassion?
While learning to be more compassionate towards oneself is a common goal, people's journeys toward that goal vary greatly. You may need help from a professional if your lack of self-compassion has led to additional challenges in relationships, your job, or other usual activities. For example, consistently providing emotional support for loved ones without confiding in them when you need support can build up emotions or feelings of isolation. If those challenging feelings disrupt your work performance and people begin to notice, that is a sign you may need guidance to develop more self-compassion.
If you have attempted to improve your compassionate skills independently but still experience significant distress, that is a sign to seek professional help. A therapist can provide structure, feedback, and exercises to increase self-compassion. Having a professional who can assess, create a plan, and provide emotional support will streamline your journey to self-compassion.
Compassionate Therapists in League City-Kemah, TX
Are you feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or anxious? Do you crave a sense of inner calm and balance? League City offers numerous therapists who can help you find tranquility. Whether you’re interested in traditional therapy, holistic approaches, or specialized treatments, this guide will assist you in selecting the right therapist in League City.
With beautiful waterfront views and easy access to nature, League City serves as an ideal setting for self-exploration and healing. Join us on this transformative journey toward discovering your peace in League City. You deserve to lead a harmonious life, and with the right therapist by your side, that aspiration can become a reality. Let us support you on this path by calling contacting us today!
